empty & open

Many religious or spiritual practices believe that the hand that comes empty, leaves empty. This can either mean, not entering a place of worship empty handed or that we come into this world with nothing and leave it with nothing. 

Advent season 2024 started on December 1 - with the first Sunday of Advent celebrating hope. The first Advent candle symbolizes a shining light in anticipation of the coming of Christ. 

hope shines bright this first Sunday of Advent

It is usually a purple candle called the Prophecy Candle - representing God's forgiveness of humanity's sins. Purple is traditionally the most important of the Advent candle colors - reflected in liturgical garments used for vestments. It is associated with prayer, contemplation, repentance, and hope. 

An apt way to close the year - hope in a time of transformation. How best to manage times of radical change? We find hope through accumulated years of observation and wisdom gathered from times. cultures and people all over the world. 

Through our shared experience we collect tips, timing and tools for navigating life. There is solace in not taking it all too personally - in knowing we are moved and moving with the rhythm and flow of ever spiraling change. 

Inevitable and divinely orchestrated - an eternal dance, an unfolding revelation, an illuminating liberation. At times unsettling - in its release, we are forever changed. 

May we all glide gently through this holiday season - buoyed by hope and comfort in the ebb and flow of that which is so much bigger than ourselves. 

Over and over – always has always will, no matter what. 

passion & drive

Art has always been a powerful tool for social and political change. In our backwater banana republic corruption ruled long before the birth of our nation. For the rest of us not born to the 1% our only recourse is to get creative while working ourselves to the max.  

From the earliest cave paintings to contemporary Street Art, artists have used their work to express their views on society and the world around them. Escape artists that we are, dreaming big, wild, bold was our means of opening up a bigger, wider, braver world than that most of us were born into. 

Giant Picnic at the US-Mexico border wall - Tecate, Mexico & California

Typically created in response to social or political issues, the bane of our brutalized existence - we protest, rebel, revolt. Better to be bathed in blood than buried in deep, dark silence. 

republic vs democracy

November 5 is a double whammy personally. It is voting day in the USA - my alternative homeland. And back in the island of my birth - Cinco de Noviembre marks a defining time in our nationalistic history. 

A golf buddy of my dad once hilariously claimed, "high tech, low tech - basta abtik!" That is the famous Bisaya mindset encapsulated in a nutshell. Blast them with bravado, coated in self-deprecating charm. Abtik is a Bisaya term that means all of these - agile, nimble, spry, quick. 

historical holiday celebration

Alive, agile, active, audacious. Definitely not one to sit back and be passive or invisible in the background. Bold, brazen, blatant, brave. You get the gist - no need to complete our alphabet. 

festival of light & life

As we celebrate All Hallows Eve and the veils between worlds thin - folks around the world, according to varying practices, beliefs and cultures - prepare altars for our ancestors. This is important work that has been passed on through generations. 

Now more than ever, we can all use that supportive energy - as we recall and honor our ancestors who have paved the way and supported our survival. I celebrate an accumulation of 38 years - from when I first started my shamanic practice and apprenticeship all those years ago. 

clay diya lamps - © Uma Shankar sharma

It is also the festival of Diwali (Deepavali) - when myriad little clay lamps (diyas) light the way to remove darkness from the face of the earth. The dharma of fire illuminates wherever it falls - giving light and warmth. 

loss & life

Saviors and superheroes doom us all - by putting all agency on one individual, reinforce how things are, glossing over real problems by taking it all on themselves. It is an unrealistic delusion of comfort and safety - instead of a society that collectively decides what best serves them.   

We need to explore frontiers beyond techno utopias and dystopias more carefully. Discuss a few fundamental aspects around the potential of technology in the world that we believe can enable or disrupt. Crucially this involves imagining and delivering together - so technology is built in collaboration with society. 

working on wholeness & wellbeing

Loss of home or lifestyle, loss of relationship, trust or homeland - these too can cause crippling grief. Loss of health, or a job, or anything integral to our stability, one's heart or connectedness to a sense of identity. 

Grief can be many things, and the processes of grief can be long lasting, very painful and remain similar and even as difficult as experiencing loss in the form of death. 

Defining what utopias and dystopias entail - not just something that's happens in a society. Like anything of value - technology and knowledge can be double-edged swords, depending on who wields it and how it gets applied. 

Author Ted Chiang in addressing technology, intelligence, and life - warns us that we might all be doomed if we don’t listen. It’s a final fling outward and upward to whoever might be listening, and it elevates our human story into beauty. 

His story, The Great Silence explores the search and humanistic need for communication. The parrot says that they don’t blame humans for causing their extinction - They just weren’t paying attention. The bitter truth is human narrators and characters are limited in language and communication by their own issues, beliefs, preferences. 

The Great Silence, a short story by Ted Chiang

Dominant cultures often favor themselves first and foremost, restricting and limiting options and solutions - dooming others to sad realizations and undebatable fates. For example, English being the dominant global language via the internet has caused many other dialects and languages to fall into disuse. 

For the survival of a disappearing minority or unsupported community - looking for a social structure which offers workable ways of addressing problems is imperative. 

Create a way of dealing - one that is consciously healthier and more constructive. And address people's concerns, issues, and complaints with better responsibly and accountably.

masskara mayhem

MassKara 2024, now on its 45th celebration of the festival - is finally ending this October 27. Typhoon season - hard rain, gusty winds, and lots of floods are minor deterrents in its whirling frenzy. 

MassKara means many faces - conceived to uplift residents in the 1980s when the twin tragedy of the sugar industry crisis and the sinking of Negros Navigation's M/V Don Juan almost wiped us all out. 

The local community needed a happy celebration to mark the resilience and perseverance demanded of Bacolodnons and Negrenses. To shift the focus from grief and loss to something brighter and better. 

MassKara 2024 logoelements

Bacolod promotes itself as the City of Smiles yet much of its pomp and festivities are built on a heavy history and heritage marred by gloom and tragedy. Through the decades – as MassKara has grown in activities as well as commercial and tourist draws - the polarity and play of light and shadow grows more extreme. 

interior castles

A rich interior life is a deep well to draw on when things get chaotic or challenging. That's why it is of utmost value that we be surrounded by what sustains and nourishes us. Being under constant threat or barraged by externals wears on us and eventually takes a toll. 

Two years without a home to call my own has been uncomfortable for a home body Cancerian crab of my nature. Moving clear across the globe and uprooting over fifteen years of my independent stake as a resident and citizen elsewhere is a total upheaval hard to prepare for - much less contend with. 

Tintagel Castle, Cornwall, England - Peter Unger/Getty Images

As this tsunami of change swirled within - the outer world squeezed and closed in - tighter, smaller, meaner. Spots of sunshine and delight grew farther apart, dimmed significantly, needed more effort to come by or sustain. 

How to feed that inner core, pour back into it some replenishment? Keep the big picture in focus, see it clearly, not let externals rub or rob it of its shine. Manage flow and progress so momentum is not impeded or halted, derailed or depleted. 

So much more is expended under unfavorable conditions than when there is full, fresh, firm love all around. Soft, tender, allowing grace - not noise, obstacles, judgement. That makes all the difference in the world.

Although we clearly want one and not the other its isn't always the case. Going where the river flows has the ease and expansiveness that struggling against the current does not foster. Seeing oneself through the filter of loving kindness is vastly removed from harsh heavy horridness. 

We love the most the one who loves us the most and we shrivel where love is withheld or absent. That's the truth. 

sacred partnerships

As the Aries full moon rises, it invites us to embrace the energy of intensity swirling around us. This lunation may bring feelings of tension and the urge to release pent-up emotions. It’s a perfect time to confront what’s been bubbling beneath the surface and create space for new beginnings.

Observe all the change happening around you and embrace it within. 

supermoon blessings

This full moon is asking you to be brave, bold, and authentic. Your dreams are within reach, and now is the time to go after them with everything you’ve got. Embrace the changes coming your way and trust that they are leading you toward the life you’ve always wanted. ~ Alex Myles

To help you navigate this transformative period, call on the healing power of bloodstone to partner with the vibrant energy of the Aries full moon.

Bloodstone is known for its ability to enhance vitality and freshness, making it a perfect companion during this time of emotional release. 

Emotionally, this Full Moon can feel like a rollercoaster. Aries’ fiery energy may stir up tension, especially if you’ve been bottling things up. Let yourself feel these emotions, but don’t let them control you. This is also a time for deep emotional healing. 

The Full Moon shines a light on the areas where we need to grow and release old wounds. It’s time to forgive yourself, let go of past hurts, and move forward into a more empowered version of yourself.

Ultimately, this full supermoon in Aries is a powerful reminder that you are in control of your life. It’s time to release any fears or doubts that have been holding you back and step into your power. 

The Universe is supporting you, but you have to be willing to take that first step. Trust that everything is happening for your highest good, even if it feels challenging right now.

Now is the time to harness the energy of this moon and work through those difficulties. Bloodstone holds the power to empower our journey, helping to clear the way for honesty and authenticity.

Embrace the energy of the Aries full moon and be guided towards clarity and courage to connect with our inner strength. 

progress over perfection

"If women want to change things, we need authority, and authority comes in good part from inside ourselves. It comes from conviction, from understanding and owning our stories, from a strong sense of who we are and what our place is in the world." ~ Sharon Blackie, If Women Rose Rooted: A Journey to Authenticity and Belonging

Mount Kanlaon rises 8,087 feet above sea level. Located in the Negros Island region of the Philippines - it is the seventh highest peak in the country and the 42nd tallest point on an island in the world.

It is the traditional homeland of the local Ati - a Negrito ethnic group indigenous to the Visayan islands. Traditional stewards of this land - they have been here 40,000 years since the earliest modern human migrations into the Philippine archipelago during the Paleolithic.

Kanlaon Volcano, October 6 - photo by Ronnie Baldonado

We are working hard to move forward locally and culturally to dismantle colonial land laws and embrace a more respectful understanding of the living Earth. In stark contrast, quite depleted areas of the forest and old logging trails tell a different, darker story. The wild beauty of this place used to expand to every horizon before it met a violent history of colonialism. 

The surrounding mountainous terrain are home to 75 percent primary old-growth forests at over 3,300 feet. Twenty five percent secondary growth forests are found in the lower slopes, crossed by four major river systems - the Malogo, Imbang, Himoga-an and Bago rivers. Forest cover has dwindled to only four percent on Negros Island.  

Flora include hardwood tree species (Dipterocarps), as well as palms, orchids, herbs and trees with medicinal value. Very rare is the local species of the cycas tree (locally called pitogo). Another prehistoric plant like the tree ferns and the protected Agathis philippinensis, (locally known as almaciga). 

Kanlaon is the habitat to important fauna including the Visayan spotted deer, Visayan warty pig, Philippine naked-backed fruit bat, and the endangered Negros shrew. It is also home to endemic and threatened species of birds. 

Counting the Visayan hornbill, Negros bleeding-heart dove, white-winged cuckoo shrike, flame templed babbler, white-throated jungle flycatcher, Visayan flower pecker, Yellow-faced flame back, Negros striped babbler and green-faced parrot finch. 

Born and raised in Bacolod City on the flat lands at its base on the western side of the island - not far from the majesty of its shade. My feelings of innate connection to the environment were profoundly altered when I explored the history of this stolen divided land. 

My sense of belonging replaced by questioning my place in the world as someone whose ancestral roots stretch to the dfar shores of Spain and Mainland China - among other lands further shaped by colonization and dispossession. 

On Mount Kanlaon we are exploring ways to develop a reciprocal stewardship framework to honor the land’s rights as well as those of humans also part of this ecosystem. Effective stewards know, love, and understand their local biodiversity. 

It is why we are working to foster an emotional connection to the land, so we don’t lose sight of whom and what we are protecting. 

art & empire on our shores

"What are the categories in which people imagine nature, history, place, war that make these two wars, nuclear and Native, so invisible?" ~ Rebecca Solnit, Savage Dreams

Election season in my two homelands bring to the forefront two wars - between colonizer trauma and human bias. 

an exploration of two landscapes

My political foundation was built on the Marcos declared dictatorship - a historical event that took place in the Philippines, where we grew up and where hundreds of students and unarmed civilians were disappeared, tormented, and tortured during the decades long, power hungry, thievery of the conjugal couple Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos under Martial Law from September 1972 to January 1981. 

Relocating and living in the USA its been over two decades since 9/11 from September 2001 until now. A badly shaken nation came together, however briefly - in a spirit of sadness and patriotism. Americans initially rallied behind the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq - though support waned and factions grew contentious over time. Most Americans viewed the threat of terrorism at home surreal and government's steps to combat it were predictably over the top. 

In seeking to give voice to the victims of history, we confront this episodes with brutal actualization in witness literature. Which the Marcos dynasty aggressively tries to erase or revise from our memories and all documentation. In the US we haven't gotten over our PTSD over being attacked on home ground - hell to pay, we are after all the self-professed saviors of the world. 

Our nations needs a Han Kang of our own as valiant vanguard visionary to permit the souls of our dearly departed and living survivors to witness our own annihilation and national demise into greed and corruption. 

The unidentifiable unburied corpses and blatant coverup lying hark back to Sophocles’ Antigone’. The harshest punishment of his time was leaving a rebel brother's body unsanctified by holy rites - letting it lie unburied on the battlefield as carrion prey. 

Today, instead of steadfastly working on peace - we have developed even more sacrilegious torments for ourselves and other. When will humanity shift away from harm? 

be a catalyst for change

A teacher once told me write to publish or don't bother to write. When I hit that publish button on what I have written, all my intentions are released into the ether, the wild, the cosmos. The act of pressing the send key on my device can be cathartic - inspiring, refreshing and reassuring. 

I put my whole self into the writing and, just maybe, what I just published will make an impact. A lot can be said about the power of written language - capturing words in tangible form lasts longer than when merely uttered or imagined. 

When carefully constructed and applied, it can be a catalyst for change.

women hold up half the sky

The rhetoric of politics is a clear example of wielding and weaponizing words. Print media and press across nations endorse their candidates with convincing zeal and authority - truthfully or otherwise. Candidates themselves are capable of much worse - qualified or not, most are unworthy to serve. 

It is humbling and an honor to possess the ability to craft words free of bias or colonization. To be able to contribute in any way to the larger work. Work that is inherently a collective and collaborative effort. It is in each one of us taking on this charge that change happens. 

I would like to create some space for you to know me as the author of this text - beyond my name, position in life, or job title - as your fellow human being. 

of gods & men

I find it interesting how the CCP Complex became an extension of our UP Diliman campus hangout and our stomping grounds when we graduated or left. It was the go-to meeting place for many of our artists gang from university days. 

While some were there for theatre rehearsals and performances, mostly we were there for the mounted exhibits, lectures, workshops, and films. Performers turned active patrons or passive participants in whatever was being offered at any given time - we showed up for it. 

arial view of the CCP Complex

We easily straddled polarities - between the CCP Complex being an Imeldific creation and our idealistic patriotism; its imposing elitist reputation and our appreciation for and love of the arts; its recognition, promotion and support of local arts and artists as well as being host to international talents and events. 

It was a time where the creative arts were at the forefront - even if often the pomp and pretense were paid for dearly by the Filipino populace under the yoke of the crippling Marcos conjugal dictatorship. 

Conservative or progressive, de buen familia or relatively unknown and with no connections - we milled together to exchange percolating ideas and ideals under open skies of the parks and pavements accessible to us all. 

Those days, we marched our parade of thoughts and feelings, exposed and fearless - flying our freak flags loud and proud. So confident and arrogant - inexperienced and lacking the foresight for any consequence or price tagged on. 

Others forged on to the beat of a found rhythm, while others joined tried and tested paths carved out for them. We meet up every now and then – accidentally or otherwise - in person or online. Over that first flush of wonder the world held for us, at a turning point, before our lives tipped. 

scattered seeds

Rather than creating yet another space for my countless scattered reflections I decided to resurrect an old thread that fell through the crack waaay back in 2009. Another chapter in my going on 69-year life. 

Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! 

Room for the River Waal - Nijmegen, The Netherlands

Here I am pursuing and strengthening my writing - starting with 250 words a day. Let us see where that leads us. The focus is the journey and not the destination - right? 

Attempting a more mindful approach at consciously clustering a day's multiple AHAs. Rather than being at the effect of who knows what. As we are swept down the river or rapids I might as well enjoy the view and entertain its effects on any interested. 

Keeping it to three a day is how I choose to deal with my AHAs. Afterall, it is not the intent to run amuck - though we remain fluid and flowing. 

Come along for the ride? 

1. Today is Lief Erikson Day - what better time to go on a journey and explore? 

2. Today's political update from Heather Cox Richardson - includes another bombshell: in 2020 Trump secretly shipped Covid-19 testing equipment to Russian president Vladimir Putin for his own personal use at a time when Americans could not get it. 

3. Sponge city designs that resist floods and increase biodiversity to help us adapt to a changing climate. Perfect reading this hurricane season. 

That’s it for today!

"[S]ometimes when my writer friends are working, they feel better and more alive than they do at any other time. And sometimes when they are writing well, they feel that they are living up to something. It is as if the right words, the true words, are already inside them, and they just want to help them get out." ~ Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird